lucie

@lucie@minute.social

it's me, lucie (aka minute) (they/them). this is my personal, unfiltered stuff, not affiliated with my employer.

if i block you, don't take it personally—you can always follow my work-related masto account.
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[?]lucie »
@lucie@minute.social

@jascha@ohai.social this made me think, so thanks. i have ADHD and while i'm also this driven, self-pressuring person, my gut reaction was that i don't feel (or don't want to feel) that my personality is mostly built on negative foundations. i feel that capitalism is mostly responsible for my pressures and pains, and i could relax more if either: 1. i had gamed capitalism to the max (FIRE etc), but it feels ethically wrong 2. cost of life in safe and interesting places was not so damn high. otoh i always had big issues relaxing on vacations, which was only recently fixed through medication.

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    [?]lucie »
    @lucie@minute.social

    @lucie@minute.social @jascha@ohai.social the new way i see it at the moment is that i had trained myself over all those years that i can only be visible and meaningfully interact with others through the work i do, which i now realize is a problem, and my new goal is to find visibility and connection outside of having to work for it

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      [?]tomate 🍅 »
      @jascha@ohai.social

      @lucie You have not trained yourself but did what gave yourself the best reactions in your brain. This is a coping mechanism.

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        [?]lucie »
        @lucie@minute.social

        @jascha@ohai.social that's what i mean, pavlovian conditioning

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          [?]tomate 🍅 »
          @jascha@ohai.social

          @lucie Ah, I got you wrong, my bad. Now I get it.

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